First Year Family Talking Points

Here are some topics you may want to discuss with your student before they begin school to prevent any misunderstandings or conflict.

Finances

  • Will your student have a checking account set up? If so, who will be responsible for balancing the account?
  • Whose name will the account be in?
  • What will happen to any refund money that the student/family may receive?
  • Who will supply spending money?
  • How much spending money is needed?
  • Will your student be getting a job at school?
  • Will your student have a credit card? If so, who will be responsible and what are the limitations?

Bills, Bills, Bills

  • Who pays for tuition? How?
  • Who pays for room and board? How?
  • Who pays for school supplies? How?
  • Who pays other bills (phone, car, etc.)? How?
  • Can your student charge expenses to their student account?

No Place Like Home-Commuter Style

  • What rules are they expected to live by when they are home (curfew, housework, use of car, etc.)
  • What will transportation options be to get to class?
  • Will your student share their class schedule so you know when they will be coming and going?
  • Are friends allowed to come home?
  • What additional responsibilities will your student have living at home? Laundry? Housework?

No Place Like Home-Residence Hall Style

  • How often will your student come home?
  • What kind of rules will there be while home on a holiday break?
  • Are friends allowed to come home?
  • How often will you plan to visit?
  • Will you come for Family Weekend or other special events?
  • How much notice will be given before a visit?

Communication

  • How often will we talk on the phone? Should we set a time?
  • Who calls whom?
  • Can we email/text each other?
  • Can we send letters or cards?

There’s something I’ve got to tell you

  • What do you want to know about their life?
  • What do you feel comfortable sharing?
  • What will they want to know about family events?
  • Do parents get to know about grades? Progress in classes? Dating relationships? Roommate issues? Homesickness?
  • What is shared about any disciplinary trouble?

Miscellaneous

  • Will your student add your phone number/email address to the campus emergency alert system?
  • Will you be added as an additional user to view bills?
  • What kinds of things does your student still need to purchase for school? Who is responsible for this?
  • If you live in a blended family, what issues arise out of that? (Who pays for what? Where are breaks spent? Who makes decisions?)
  • What insurance coverage does your student have-health, personal, car?

Expectations Table

As a family, fill in the table below as a guide to assist in conversations that may take place between a new student and family members. This helps both parties understand what the expectations are before the topic may arise.

Topic Student Expectation Parent Expectation
Student decides to drop a class Tell my parent beforehand so it doesn’t disrupt any loans or insurance coverage Be understanding, expects student to receive academic advising, and check to check with financial aid office before making decision
A bill is due at the beginning of the month
Student gets a job
Student receives final grades for semester
Student decides they want to switch roommates, or move-out of Residential Hall
Student has a roommate conflict
Student plans to take a road trip
Parent wants to visit student for the weekend
Student charges additional expenses to student account
Parent can't get ahold of student at agreed upon time
Student has a medical emergency
Student has a psychological emergency