BECKY RICKARD: STICK IT IN THE FRIDGE

I was a tomboy when I was young. I loved to pull the legs off daddy long-legs and watch them wiggle; I played cops and robbers and sported an NFL lunchbox. I was crushed for weeks when my mom wouldn't let me walk around with my shirt off after I turned four.

As I grew older and began attending middle school, or prepubescent hell as I prefer to call it, I noticed that other girls in school weren't playing soccer with the boys at recess.

In fact, many of the girls were "going out" with the boys I had slide tackled and scored against during lunch.

I decided to make friends, girl friends. I started wearing make-up, bought my first bra and kissed my first boyfriend behind the church bells.

I was balanced.

This balance soon swayed when I attended an all female high school. I looked around me and saw so many girls more feminine than me.

I tried to act flirty and precocious, but I felt like an impostor.

I cared about the same feminine things as did the "girlie" girls but couldn't get the demeanor quite right. I also still cared about many masculine things like football scores, baseball trades and The MacKenzie brothers, you hoser.

In college, I learned the word androgynous.

I love that word. Androgynous: pertaining to or containing both male and female characteristics. I felt much better about having a higher batting average than many of my old boyfriends.

In one of my many psychology classes, I learned that androgynous people are the most psychologically healthy people.

I was also informed that people who experiment with drugs are also psychologically healthy. Both of these revelations pleased me.

The college that taught me about androgyny was an all female college. The more they taught me about it, the worse I wanted to leave that estrogen infested campus. I began to hate the fact that I was female because I was judged harshly in regard to the masculine aspects of my personality.

So I came back to St. Louis and applied to UM-St. Louis. This was the first time I had classes with males in six and a half years. It was great. I couldn't believe how intelligent and cerebral men could be.

I had cut myself off from man far too long.

Sure, I bumbled around like a prepubescent schoolgirl at first, having crushes on any attractive male in my path and laughing inappropriately at stupid jokes. However, time passed and I felt comfortable again.

I was finally at an institution that not only taught but also displayed the positive effects of androgyny. I was surrounded by people who could talk about Brett Favre and Alicia Silverstone.

I finally feel comfortable enough to say that lizards make great pets; Princess Diana will be missed; the reinstatement of the two point conversion saved football; and I need to get my hair and nails done.