It all had to do with a phone call. Not a huge deal, really. It was not nearly as earth shattering as the choice before Jesus whether to die on the cross or not. It was just a choice about how patient to be with someone on the phone. And it wasn’t like I had a lot of excuses to be short or tired or unavailable. It had been a good day. But I was trying to write my homily. And this was the 5th phone call in the past 20 minutes. And it was someone whom I had spoken to earlier on in the day. And I wanted the phone call to be done. But I knew they needed to be listened to. And I was torn. And in that moment, I knew the decision I would make would be vital to my discipleship. Because it was a ‘grain of wheat moment.’

What, you might ask, is a ‘grain of wheat moment?’ You heard the analogy in the gospel – unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains just a grain of wheat. But… but if it dies, it produces much fruit. It is a simple analogy, which reflects a simple truth. THE PATTERN for living is found in those little choices, those interrupting phone calls, those unexpected moments of the day when we are ‘not on duty’ as it were. And the choices we make either reflect that pattern of dying to self, or they serve to take us further from that truth. That’s why that simple phone call was so crucial to my life. Because either I chose to die to self so the other might know life, or I fail as a Christian. And how would I ever do it right in the big decisions if I don’t do it right in the small decisions. So I stayed on the line, longer than I would have (perhaps not as long as I should have…) so that the other might know life.

And the truth about ‘grain of wheat moment’s’ is that we either practice them all the time, make them habitual as it were, or we will never do it when it matters. For if we have trained the will to choose the self in the small stuff, then we will chose the self in the Large stuff. Whoever hates his life will find it, but whoever loves his life loses it. The small moments of setting ourselves aside become hugely important for us. For they set the pattern for our living and choosing. (which is why no sin is trivial in the large specter of things – for each sin teaches the will to choose SELF and not the other.)

And what Jesus teaches with his life is that this is THE PATTERN OF LIVING – the TRUTH ABOUT LIFE. To find it, you’ve got to give it away. And you’ve got to practice it in the everyday, small, unimportant…

There is a story, which I heard was true –though I can’t verify it. Apparently CNN reporter Martin Savage had been interviewing 4 marines with whom he had been embedded. In the interview, he spoke about how well he was taken care of. He spoke of how much the marines also took care of each other. And when he was done, as a way to say thank you to those whom he had interviewed, he offered the use of his videophone for about five minutes for each of them to call anyone they want. Since many of had not been able to contact their families for months, he figured they would call them to let them know they are all right. The 1st marine asked if he could give his time to his lieutenant – because his lieutenant’s wife is pregnant and he and his wife needed the time more. The rest of them decided not to call their own parents or family, but the family of a buddy who had been killed, to find out how they were doing and to be a support to them… Men who had learned the ‘grain of wheat truth’ in the day to day, lived the grain of wheat truth in the big moment.