THE TWO COW PHILOSOPHY:

Political and Economic Philosophies Explained in Simple “Two Cow” Terms

• Socialism:

  • You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor.

• Communism:

  • You have two cows. The government takes them both and provides you with milk.

• Fascism:

  • You have two cows. The government takes them and sells you the milk.

• Bureaucracy:

  • You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours it down the drain.

• Capitalism:

  • You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

• Corporate:

  • You have two cows. You sell one, force the other to produce the milk of four cows and then act surprised when it drops dead.

• Global Capitalism in a Bureaucratic Democracy:

  • You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point that you must sell them both in order to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow which was a gift from your government.  

• Democracy:

  • You have two cows--if you want.

URL: http://www.umsl.edu/~keelr/010/twocows.htm
Owner: Robert O. Keel: rok@umsl.edu
Last Updated: Wednesday, April 18, 2001

Unless otherwise noted, all pages within the web site http://www.umsl.edu/~keelr/ © 2001 by Robert O. Keel.
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